Improving and maintaining my mental health did not come solely through Yoga, but rather was the result of Yoga changing my spiritual awareness and willingness to let go of negative thoughts and patterns of behaviour.
Tree Pose on a Tree Stump
There were many steps taken before I found Yoga to improve my mental health, but once I found Yoga, I did't ever want to look back. Yoga gave me a sense of control over my body and my life. Holding Asanas translated into holding my place in life. It made me feel in control of everything around me as well as myself, and I had been desperately searching for that for a long time. Pushing myself to hold certain Asanas, such as Tree Pose and Warrior 2, showed me that I can hold my ground and be who I am, no matter the circumstances. I can be strong and confident in who I am and not change for anyone.
As time advanced, my increased stamina translated into becoming grounded in who I am. I found more confidence and peace, both spiritually and emotionally. I found a trust in the Universe and in myself that had not previously existed. With this trust, I became more positive in my thinking and started believing that life is worth living. I found a way to be thankful for being alive, which I had never felt before. As my confidence and mental well-being improved, my physical circumstances began to improve. I began to make more positive choices for myself, reaching goals that I had not expected to reach so quickly, such as owning my own business and having my own place.
My Biggest Little Blessing
Once I had my own space and business, I found a true sense of happiness. I faced my fears of being lonely and having to do things solely for myself. I found a way to help people with something that helped me, and that leaves me feeling fulfilled. There are still times that I feel sad or alone, but it doesn’t take me long to remember what blessings I have and how grateful I am for them.
It took me a long time to find the happiness I feel today. I was in therapy for over ten years and addicted to marijuana for thirteen. I was angry, depressed, and spent every moment of my existence running from being alone. Now I revel in being alone and wouldn't have it any other way. There are many ways to find happiness, but it starts with facing fears and diving into what has hurt you the most. Yoga will help you to become more aware and more open, and with that you can grow yourself into a positive, fulfilled, happy individual who walks through life feeling confident and content. I am proof of this.